IF's Awakening
by Archaeologist of Humanity
Summary: IF was going about her business one day when a package turns up...One with a side effect that could be deadly...Or good. Depending on how you look at it.


Disclaimer: Just something I wrote while thinking about the sleeping patterns of a certain guild agent...

I don't own Hyperdimension Neptunia or anything to do with the franchise.

This is merely a work of fiction. I don't know IF that well, which is why I am trying to get used to her. Let me know!

* * *

Brown hair glistened as the owner of said hair walked into her apartment on the ground floor. She had always thought of herself as a simple girl, not to fancy, but not plain... Well...

Knowing Goddess' and various other people of high importance put her high on the kill list of a few criminal organisations, etc, but...

She yawned. She was tired.

She was very tired. She reached into her pocket and put her main cell phone on silent while the rest were on charging. She turned around and closed the door and locked it. Heading into the apartment.

IF was her name and investigating things...and exploring were her game. If you wanted to put it that way.

IF walked into her living room and sat on one of the big comfy chairs that Nepgear had bought her last Christmas. IF had tried to say no, saying it was FAR to expensive a chair for her...but somehow, SOMEHOW, Nepgear had insisted... that and having a mince pie in your face from her sister didn't really help. But she accepted the chair in the end. Even if it was non-conditional.

"Meow!"

IF glanced in the corner of her eye and she saw her small (Make that regular size, but to IF small) cat in the corner waiting for some food. IF mentally smiled, making sure not to smile on the outside incase anyone had CCTV in her place...Although that may be creepy if that were the case-

"MEOW!"

IF jumped out of her skin and bounced up. "Alright, alright! I'm up! I'll get you some food...Just... Patience, okay?"

The cat seemed to like this and nodded its head, heading for the kitchen ahead of IF.

IF allowed herself to smile a little despite having the attitude of not wanting to be seen smiling. It was okay though wasn't it?

Red fur cut of her off of her thinking as she blinked. "jeisvm?"

IF coughed and spluttered as she saw that the cat had jumped onto the kitchen counter. Acting like a cusion to prevent IF from hurting herself. She had been half a cm from the counter in her daydream that she could have really hurt herself if she didn't pay attention.

"Thanks Radi. I needed that."

The cat named Radi purred as IF stroked it and looked to the cats bowl's. She filled them both full of food and water and headed back to the living room. "Call me if you need me Radi, okay?"

"Meowmeoemeomeoem-"

IF let a slight giggle leave her lips, hearing the cat munch on the food she had given her.

She took off her coat and hung it on the back of the door, when a wave of tiredness, smacked IF like Arfoire hitting her with eggplants.

IF looked to her chair and then to the bed that Compa had insisted she have. IF was used to sleeping on rough surfaces, even the floor...If she had to.

Yawning and taking the green bow out of her hair, she headed to the bed, changed into her nightwear once everything was secure and locked, then fell asleep on the bed...Forgetting to tuck herself in.

 **[Time: 01:42AM, outside the apartment]**

Neptune frowned as she knocked on the door of the apartment again. "Hey, Iffy! Open up, I've got SO many things to tell and ask you! Open up!"

Compa put a hand on Neptune's hand and looked through the keyhole. "She's asleep, Nep-Nep." She yawned. "I should be as should you...We are all tired..."

Neptune looked to Compa. "But what about the prizes I won!? I even one, one of them for her!"

Compa sighed out loudly. "Nep-Nep...Just be considerate. Let's go and come back later...I'll even make you something if you let me get my sleep?"

Neptune thought about it for a bit. "Pudding?"

Compa nodded and rolled her eyes. "Yes, even pudding. Now come on, let's go."

Neptune nodded. "I like those odds!"

Nepgear snuck around the corner when Compa and Neptune left and put a small box on the floor outside IF's apartment, with a small note attached to it, disappearing into the night.

 **[Time: 10:55AM]**

IF rolled over in her bed and slowly got up, realising that Radi had slept with her the previous night. After getting up, feeding and putting out the cat...Stuff, into the bin, she saw the package. "Hmm?"

IF picked up the package and walked inside with it. "I wonder who-" She saw the note and smiled. "Nepgear..."

On the note was written this:

'Sorry to bother you IF-san, I just about managed to deliver this out of sight of Neptune and Compa... They were at your door last night around 1-2ish. I managed to use a little bit of magic to hide my presence so they wouldn't see/sense me. Hehe. I just... I just thought you could use this with your little cat...Did you give the little girl a name yet? I hope its cute! If not - THE POWER OF CUTE COMPELS YOU!... That doesn't work does it? Anyway, I'll go now and I'll speak to you soon! From, your eternal friend...Although I HATE how dark the sounds...I think you'll LOVE my new idea! ;) Love, ~Nepgear'

IF smiled and sat down after reading the note. 'I thought it may be Neptune and Compa at my door last night...But I didn't actually think it was them...'

Radi walked in and nudged IF's side. "Meow..."

IF looked down and stroked him several times. "I know. We'll play in a bit. Just let me open this... 'kay?"

Radi nodded as though it understood. "Reo!" It then went to play with some ball or another that Neptune had gotten it for Easter...

'Crazy cats...And Neptune. Definately blame Neptune...' IF thought to herself.

IF eyed the box and opened it slowly.

Then everything went black for the guild agent...

* * *

Day ?

* * *

"I'm SO sorry!"

"You're not acting like it!"

"Onee-chan! PLEASE BELIEVE ME! I never wanted her to get knocked out!"

"Maybe I should try knocking you out...Anyway, Iffy, you can wake up now!~"

IF groaned as she tried to open her eyes. Was she - Yep, she was in hospital...Again.

An overwhelming surge of pain went through IF's vains as she snapped her eyes open, she wasn't wired up to anything...Okay, that was weird-

'I wonder if Iffy is okay...'

Did she just hear Compa's thoughts!?

IF turned her head to look at Compa. "Compa, I'm fine. You don't have to worry."

Compa blinked in shock. "I didn't say anything Iffy..."

"Eh?"

Histoire was in the room also and facepalmed a few moments later. "Don't tell me..."

"Histy? You figure somethin' out?"

Histoire looked to Nepgear, "What, precisely, did you put in that box Nepgear?"

Nepgear put a finger to her lip. "I was working on a project... I put the resulting smoke into the box, it was meant to be a joke!" She flailed her arms up and down like a duck.

Neptune looked to the ceiling. "She's not a duck..." She whispered. Yes, I know this Neptune. Can we have no more further fourth wall breakages? The ewoks I hired to fix the last breakage left a few seconds ago.

'Mmmmm...What should I have for pudding next...I know! Pudding!'

IF sweatdropped. "Nep...I can hear your thoughts..."

Neptune blinked. "Nah, there's no way! You'd have to be like me for that!"

Nepgear looked to her sister. 'I wonder when Onee-chan will let me take a picture of her in her birthday suit for Christmas next...'

IF looked to Nepgear. "I don't even WANT to repeat what you just thought Nepgear"

Nepgear blushed. "Oh...Goodness. What have I done... I must have put my experimental goddess potion in the box of smoke!"

Histoire sighed. "More of a headache...Actually...With IF around, and assuming you're right about this Nepgear, then maybe we can get Neptune to work!"

Neptune paled. 'Anything but work!...I'll worship Iffy if I have to...Wait...' She looked to her left and there was IF, smirking at her.

IF put a finger to her lip. "Did I just hear your thought correctly Nep?"

Neptune shook her head. "No! Of course you didn't! Ah-ha...It was a joke!"

"A joke, huh?" IF lowered her head and pretended to be sad... Which was working on Neptune for some reason that IF couldn't work out - Was Neptune playing along with her? Or was she honestly, THIS dumb?

"Don't be sad Iffy..." Neptune walked closer while Nepgear looked to Histoire, the pair sharing a look of disbelief.

IF began to giggle. "You crack me up Nep..."

Neptune paled again. "C-crack up? I didn't break you did I?"

Even Histoire couldn't hold back a slight chuckle. She was amused by Neptune's antics...Truely.

"What kind of Goddess do you think you'll be? Getting back on topic?"

IF looked to Histoire then to Compa who asked her the questions. "I dunno...A nice one I hope. It's all your fault though Nepgear."

It was Nepgear's turn to pale as Neptune looked at her. 'HAH! The tables have turned on the fruitless wonder of Nepgear's nonsense spew making cough air!'

IF sighed. "Shut up Neptune...In fact, can everyone just calm down? All your thoughts make the room loud..."

Poor IF...

* * *

One Shot Done. Could be a Two-Shot...


End file.
